Last week Tom (aka SeasideMan) blogged a piece of automatic writing on the creative writers blog. Click here to see the results.

I've never tried this before but just had to have a go. The only editing I did was to capitalise the letter "i" and put a section back into lower case where I'd left "caps lock" on. Don't you just hate it when that happens?

Anyway here's the result.

Where shall I go as I let my fingers loose over the black black keys that have become some much a part of my life? Monochrome is all I can see which is a very sad. I want rainbows, prisms, colour, laughter and joy I don’t want dark and drab and dust and crumbs of hastily eaten toast; I should be outside I shouldn’t be chained to this oppressive machine let me go let me fly let me sing and dance.

I think my subconscious is telling me to leave my computer alone!

Obviously after cleaning the keyboard!

You'd be wrong in thinking I was talking about Glastonbury. That said, when I telephoned my Mum last night she said:

"Songs of Praise was lovely and we're now watching Glastonbury"

Let's hope I get a better night's sleep tonight!

Or you might just miss the boat!

Today is your last chance to vote for your favourite picture in CJs Snapsfactor3 Competition.

To see all the entries and the details of how to vote click here

I didn't get much sleep last night I spent a lot of time thrashing about due to the humid weather What else did you think I meant?

Well as I was lying there I began to think about different positions (as you do!) *steady - your minds are in the gutter again*

When I'm sleeping on my own I generally adopt the foetal position but can't think of anything nicer than spooning with a loved one.

Have a lovely weekend everyone

I've just been reading this article:

LONDON (Reuters) - A meat company has been branded Dickensian after forcing its employees to clock-off every time they want to go to the toilet.

The union Unite has criticized the meat processor for "essentially stopping staff pay when they visit the toilet."

The company, based in Dumfriesshire, insists anyone wanting to be excused from the system has to provide medical evidence, the union added.

Unite, joint general secretary, Tony Woodley said in a statement on its website: "We believe these are Dickensian employment practices.

"It's outrageous that in 2008 workers should have to endure the indignity of clocking out for toilet breaks as well as other practices which we believe invade their privacy."

It has called on Tesco to force its supplier to end such a practice.

"Brown Brothers have refused to change its policy, but the union is demanding that Tesco the UK's largest retailer ensures decent employment standards within its supply chain," Woodley added.

"The workers at Brown Brothers are essentially having their pay stopped for going to the toilet. Tesco must do everything in its power to investigate these practices and put an end to them."

Nobody was immediately available for comment from Brown Brothers.

Gives a whole new meaning to "brown nosing"!!!

..............on a sunny day:

This is your lesson for the day.

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while hard work and knowledge will get you close, and attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit that will put you over the top.

I thought you might want one this evening.

I'll get one sent over along with a grate of Guinness.

I thought you might see a little more of my day at the seaside.

First we had to stop off at the shop to buy buckets and spades for the children and one of these for me. Well a girl has to treat herself hasn't she?

When we arrived at the beach I set up basecamp.

... I like it

No this isn't a new recipe!

HAVE A GOOD DAY!

Well they were on 23rd December!

Say yes if I call out your name:

Right then with the possible exception of Philippe I don't know any of you so STOP SENDING ME E-MAILS!!!!

ps Your messages go into an inbox called "indésirables" isn't that clear enough - you're not welcome!!!!

These are the facts about me using the recent meme going round:

Marian needs a proper physician
(Is there a doctor in the blog?)
Marian looks like a peasant
(Sometimes!)
Marian likes her pencils sharp sharp sharp
(The nurses won't let me have sharp objects!)
Marian says the ‘f’ word
(Never ever!!!)
Marian wants a lawyer
(Not a bad idea - tall, dark, handsome and loaded!)
Marian does Bob Ross
(Who's Bob Ross?)
Marian hates the West and wants enough money to return East for a life (erm?????)
Marian Goes to Northern Ireland
(Why not - I have relatives there)
Marian loves advertising
(I don't need to!!)
Marian has reached baseball's state finals
(Well ....)
Marian gets applause for a breathless performance
(It has been said!!)
Marian eats the cake
(With a nice cup of coffee naturally)
Marian can get every fellow artist to respond
(Sometimes)
Marian drinks too much and is taken home by the count
(As long as it's not Dracula!)
Marian makes mild thespic waves as Dyesebel
(On the stage again!)

I'm not sure who I nicked this from but if you want to have a go here's what you do:

Type in what the questions ask you into Google search and try to use the first thing that comes up as your answer.

Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search
Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] likes" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] says" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] does" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] goes" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] loves" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] has" in Google search:
Type in "[your name] gets" in the Google search:
Type in "[your name] eats" in the Google search:
Type in "[your name] can" in the Google search:
Type in "[your name] drinks" in the Google search:
Type in "[your name] makes" in the Google search:

Have fun and leave me a comment to say that you're going to do it so that I can look out for yours - unless you've already done it then leave me a comment saying just that

The longer I live in France I see more similarities in the language. Last night there was a terrible storm and when I stopped at the boulangerie on my way home this morning there was talk about "l'orage". All I have to do is work on my pronunciation and I've got this language sussed!

Anyway back to the storm. When I arrived back home I found one of my three silver birch trees had been decapitated and is now some four metres shorter than it was when I left home on Friday. "Quelle dommage" what a shame!

That's the title of a little performance my grandchildren are giving at a school concert later this afternoon. Aimée is playing the part of "une chatte" and Louis is going to be "un poussin". I'm sure there'll be some pictures to follow.

After the performance there's a meal of paella - perhaps containing poussin but hopefully not cat!! *only joking*

Well I didn't have a photo of a little red hen so this one will have to do instead.

I entitled this one "The Bigamist" *it seemed funny at the time!*

Ooops wrong title!

Say No to Cheese!

I've heard it said that you shouldn't eat cheese late at night.

Bad cheese - naughty cheese!

ps - blue cheese = blue dreams (not that sort of blue movie blue!)

Does anyone have an antedote for cheese induced insomnia?

That's shallot!

You will find some more images over on the Photography Group Blog

They are crops

To see more and find out what they are look at my next post

Make believe it's your first time

We've tried our hand at love before.
We've been around the game enough to know the score.
But then is then, and now is now.
And now is all that matters anyhow.

Make believe it's your first time, leave your sadness behind.
Make believe it's your first time, and I'll make believe it's mine.

The door is closed, it's you and me.
We'll take our time with love, the way it ought to be.
This moment's ours, tonight's the night.
And if we fall in love, that's all right.

Make believe it's your first time, leave your sadness behind.
Make believe it's your first time, and I'll make believe it's mine.

So close your eyes and hold me close.
Let our hearts pretend that love is ours to share tonight, and it might never end.

Make believe it's your first time, leave your sadness behind.
Make believe it's your first time, and I'll make believe it's mine.
Make believe it's your first time, and I'll make believe it's mine.

Sung by Karen Carpenter

Here's a "Cosmopolitan" style survey thingy you might like to try

Find out whether you're diving into the dating pool as a perfect 10, or just doing a bellyflop!.

When a cute stranger steps on your foot in a crowded bar, you:
• Say, "Watch it!" (Score -1)
• Writhe in pain (Score 4)
• Apologise (Score 1)
• Crack a joke (Score 3)
• Start a conversation (Score 2)

When you meet someone you'd like to get to know better, how do you proceed?
• You pitch it as an invite to a group get-together with friends (Score 1)
• You go direct. Something like, "I'd love to get together with you sometime." (Score 2)
• You use an excuse: "We both like Bond - I know where Goldfinger is playing." (Score 3)
• You give the person your number before being asked (Score 4)
• You wait and let them ask for your number (Score -1)

Your screen name most closely matches which category:
• Practical — maybe related to your name or city (Score 1)
• A good conversation-starter — a hobby, nickname (Score 2)
• A play on words that gets people laughing or thinking (Score 3)
• Something sexy (Score 4)
• Related to the car you drive, or to your job title (Score -1)

At an office happy hour, you lock eyes with someone standing solo at the bar. Your move?
• Ditch your cocktail and ask them for advice on what you should order (Score 2)
• Keep an eye peeled for an hour, to be sure they're not someone's date (Score 1)
• Send over a margarita from across the bar (Score 4)
• Nada. No flirting at work parties (Score -1)
• Ask them to save you from your work party for a moment, and offer to buy that drink (Score 3)

The best way to make someone sit up and notice you:
• Making intense eye contact (Score 4)
• Telling a hilarious story (Score 3)
• Acting disinterested (Score -1)
• Being non-threatening and friendly (Score 1)
• Asking a lot of questions and casually touching (Score 2)

If you scored:

Less than 0
If flirting is an Olympic sport, you're going for the... wait, what's below bronze? Aluminium? When you're around a love interest, you become introverted. The problem: It gives the impression you're unhappy and disinterested — even when you may really like someone. An easy fix? Ask questions. Everyone loves talking about themselves, plus when you tune in to the answers it shows you're a great listener.

1-6
OK, time to dash an old flirting myth — when you treat someone as "just a friend," it backfires. They end up thinking of you as just a friend. Unless you commit to clear flirting signals — such as the casual arm touch, or smiling while making eye contact — your flirting form may flop. So make your interest clear, instead of leaving them wondering if you like them in that way.

7-14
Your flirting form is like that perfect martini — a great balance of style and smoothness. Your twist? Your natural curiosity about people leaves them feeling like they made a real connection. How's that for a perfect 10?

15-20
When you turn on the charm, stand back — you give it your all. The problem? Sometimes your aggressive moves may label you as a player, someone who couldn't possibly be looking for a real relationship. Slowing down to make a legitimate connection with someone would boost your success ratio in a big way.

My score? now that would be telling!

Enough about the weather - I've been playing this over and over and LOUD!

This is based on an idea I nicked borrowed from Kibitz

And now it's time for a coffee

Our pretty little girl
So lovely and so sweet
You brighten up our world
And make our lives complete
~~x~~

Well it looks like I was dish of the day or 'plat du jour' even more correct to say dish of the night (plat du nuit).

Right I saw some lavender growing next to the post office!

ps I shouldn't have posted this the other night "Night Starvation"

To my new blogfriend